are good.

lack of exams is good.
playing in the west end was good.
reading some of the stuff on my devwatch has been very good.

chest infection was not so good.
but now things are good again.



i've been writing a diary for two weeks now, and it feels weird to flick back pages and relive days i thought i'd forget.
i also find it slightly strange in a sad sort of way that i can't write it with my door open, yet i can't sleep with my door closed. this involves a rather cold-toed trip from my bed to my door, because i never remember my slippers, despite placing them right underneath my bed. i always spot them on the way back and mentally kick myself.

and then actually stub my toe on my bed because i've been so busy mentally kicking myself that i've forgotten to stop walking.

yeah. reflexes are not so good right now.

i like mornings at the moment, because i get up early and make proper coffee and listen to the doors shutting. the bedroom door. the bathroom door. the front door. the car door. i'm thinking of timing it and making averages so i can predict how late the kids will be to school depending on how much they oversleep. perhaps it will scare them.

this would be good, but also not so good.

on the train back from london today, i met an old man who spoke arabic, french, and flemish, but not english. he was a very interesting man. i spoke to him in fledgling french and he looked so relieved to be understood. from the look on his face i thought he was travelling alone, but then he told me that he was travelling with his family. i asked where they were and he told me they were on another carriage. i don't understand families sometimes.

it's 22 past 1 in the morning, and i know this because my computer tells me so. i was asked the time today and i realised i still can't read clocks. should this worry me? i think this is not good. there is a difference between innocence and ignorance, and i've strayed into the latter.

another thing i find amusing today is that the older i get, the more simple i write because the more complicated things are. back in the day, things were simple and words were complicated, but now i have cheques and rent and a nearly-romance and i'm shedding syllables like dandruff. i find it amusing that you can over-complicate and over-simplify but you can never over-describe, because that would be just telling it like it is. i often wonder why this is seen as a negative trait - i thought we valued honesty?

honesty is good.
i think blunt is good.
but harsh is not good.

another value we have is democracy. i was in london today and i sat down next to a man who was reading the paper. i talked with him for a while and he bought me coffee because i agreed with him about UKIP. if i had been lying, would that count as an expenses claim? does it count as an expenses claim because i wasn't lying?

democracy is good.
politics is not good.

is politics a plural noun? it sure seems like it should be. today i found out that it is not, in fact, "none of them are" because "none" is not a plural noun, it's a contraction of "not one" and that is quite evidently singular. despite "them" being plural, "one" is the important bit so that's what decides the plurality of the verb. i find it faintly amusing that even in grammar, the individual is worth more than the majority.

i'm quite enjoying rambling because it feels like a long time since i had a good ramble, although, really, i do it every night for 2 A5 pages, and every sunday at 9pm in a blank greetings card. unfortunately, "none of them has been sent" sounds really wrong so i'll say that i have not sent any of them. is any a contraction? it sounds too short. but then again, "i'm" is shorter.



when i was smaller, i used to freak myself out on long car journeys by whispering "i am, i am, i am, i am, i am" to myself, until i was so utterly in awe of my own existence that i could barely breathe.



"i am rachel. i am here. i am, i am, i am."


it's 35 past 1 which means it's been 8 + 5 minutes after 22 past 1 which means it's been 12 minutes. this is how my brain works out the passage of time, and i think it's no wonder i am still constantly amazed that "i am". it's funny, i was waiting in a restaurant for 10 minutes and it felt like a whole lot longer because i ordered a table for two while i was waiting. i got bored after a while and sat at the bar, and a waitress asked if i wanted a drink. i decided to mix two vices and have irish coffee, but by that time, that was my fifth of the day and i've been trying to only have three.

this means i can only have one today (because tomorrow is today now) and this worries me slightly.

no matter how melancholy or detached or rambling this seems, this: [link] is making me happy at the moment. (take a look at the last two lines of the first stanza of the entry for june tenth. isn't it funny how words can pick me up like my mother couldn't after i outgrew her arms?)